Another rough, rough night. I don’t think Willow really slept, slept enough to allow me to sleep, until 7 a.m. Between 3 and 5 I put in earplugs. When I took them out, she was still crying. It must be teething, because this is really bad.
Miraculously, I had enough energy to make the six-hour drive, and it went pretty well. I bought a contraption to allow for hands-free pumping while driving. When I showed it to my mom, she gave me a look that said, “Why in the world are you going through all of this?” To Willow she said, “I hope you remember all your mom went through for you.”
Yes, I probably looked like a complex medical patient to any truckers that got a good look (I tried to go by truck windows as quickly as possible, and also tried my best to not get stopped). But I kind of liked pumping while driving. Since I had to drive anyway, pumping was getting another thing done, rather than preventing me from doing things as is usually the case. Since I had nothing else urgent to attend to and Willow was strapped in back, I could pump for 40, even 50 minutes. I still didn’t get a ton, but it was something and I can hope that all that time might eventually stimulate production. Though I’m starting to wonder whether the fact that I never experience letdown or leaking means my milk stays too far up. Willow is obviously able to get it but perhaps the pumps are made for women who have a letdown, allowing their milk to spill into the bottle, rather than drip, drip, nothing like mine does.
I need a sitter this evening and I asked her to come a few hours early, so that I could get prepared and have a little time to focus. Hal-le-lu-jah! It is such a fantastically wonderful feeling. A bit of quiet time to myself each day is what would have made a very good vacation great. After the absence, I appreciate and treasure it even more.