Sunday, June 12, 2011

Day one of mother-infant daughter road trip

Another rough, rough night.  I don’t think Willow really slept, slept enough to allow me to sleep, until 7 a.m.  Between 3 and 5 I put in earplugs.  When I took them out, she was still crying.  It must be teething, because this is really bad.

Miraculously, I had enough energy to make the six-hour drive, and it went pretty well.  I bought a contraption to allow for hands-free pumping while driving.  When I showed it to my mom, she gave me a look that said, “Why in the world are you going through all of this?”  To Willow she said, “I hope you remember all your mom went through for you.” 

Yes, I probably looked like a complex medical patient to any truckers that got a good look (I tried to go by truck windows as quickly as possible, and also tried my best to not get stopped).  But I kind of liked pumping while driving.  Since I had to drive anyway, pumping was getting another thing done, rather than preventing me from doing things as is usually the case.  Since I had nothing else urgent to attend to and Willow was strapped in back, I could pump for 40, even 50 minutes.  I still didn’t get a ton, but it was something and I can hope that all that time might eventually stimulate production.  Though I’m starting to wonder whether the fact that I never experience letdown or leaking means my milk stays too far up.  Willow is obviously able to get it but perhaps the pumps are made for women who have a letdown, allowing their milk to spill into the bottle, rather than drip, drip, nothing like mine does.  

I need a sitter this evening and I asked her to come a few hours early, so that I could get prepared and have a little time to focus.  Hal-le-lu-jah!  It is such a fantastically wonderful feeling.  A bit of quiet time to myself each day is what would have made a very good vacation great.  After the absence, I appreciate and treasure it even more.    

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