Pregnant lady on a bike

Twenty-three weeks and I'm still biking to work. I was wondering how long I'd last on the bike and I figured the end point would be somewhere around now. But I hope to make it a couple more weeks. I'm trying to push my biking ability as long as I can. It's my quickest and cheapest option of getting to work, and also the most flexible. If I leave five minutes later by bike, it doesn't impact the time I arrive at home or work much. If I leave five minutes late for the train, I miss it and can be delayed by a half hour, or more.

Also, the beautiful weather makes me want to keep riding. It is tough riding uphill when it's 90-plus degrees. But those days seem to be ending. When I can go out in shorts and a t-shirt, hop on my bike and ride in comfortable weather, there is really nothing better.

So I'll see how far I can continue into September. My pace, especially uphill, has slowed, as has my strength. But I do need the exercise. At some point, I imagine I'll reach the point where I can't lift my leg over the men's bike. Or where the belly is just too uncomfortable, or causes problems with balance. Until then, I'll just do my best to not get hit, and to remember that accidents happen to automobile passengers as well.

Have you continued biking well into your second or third trimester? Would love to hear experiences from others.

New girl thoughts

All of a sudden, I’m realizing that having a girl makes issues I used to be able to ignore suddenly relevant. The number of issues I will have to research, study and take decisions on will grow.

Among the new topics:

The HPV vaccine. I’m too old, so it’s not of concern to me. I will have to decide whether or not to get it for my daughter. There is still lots of time to think about it, so I’m not jumping in now. But I will be paying attention to information that comes out in the next few years.

Breast cancer, the BRCA gene and related topics. I’m not at high risk and it doesn’t run in my family, so I don’t follow such news carefully. But my husband’s mother had a double mastectomy as a preventative measure. She didn’t have the BRCA gene, but she had a triple negative breast cancer. And her mother had breast cancer twice. So it may well be an issue of concern for a daughter.

Early puberty. It FREAKS me out how early girls are entering puberty in this country. I used to look at it from the sidelines, as an interesting and disturbing sociological phenomenon. I don’t want my daughter developing breasts at eight. I want her to physically be a child as long as she is a child. While I try to go for organic, grass-fed meat and dairy products, I’m not religious about it. But with a daughter, I will probably step up these efforts. I’m going to want to learn more about the potential causes of early puberty and do what I can to do to help her avoid it.
Any other topics in which you find that that having a girl made you suddenly have to develop a certain level of expertise?

One nice thing about a female fetus is that Mark and I find girl’s names much easier to agree upon than boys. I think we are set with a first name and it’s just the middle name and the configuration of the double last name left to work out. It’s weird to me to identify the fetus with a probable name four months before birth. Especially since River didn’t have a name until a few days after birth. Even after he’d emerged, he was still nameless.

What are your thoughts on telling people the name? Part of me wants to skip it because I’m not looking for opinions. I think once the baby is born, people won’t be likely to say how much they hate it or to lobby retroactively for their favorite. Also, I’m hesitant to give it such a formal identity. It feels weird to me when people refer to their unborn children with names. What if something happens to it? Then that name is pretty much useless in the future. But another part thinks that if people ask, perhaps it’s not such a big thing to share.

The boy name I came across and liked (and Mark accepted) the week before we found out the gender? That one I’m hanging on to. Just in case.

How long does it take people to notice?

Along with how long can a pregnant lady ride a men’s bike to work, another question I’m wondering is – how long will it take before anyone notices that I’m pregnant?

Until a week or so ago, I took the lack of comments to mean that I really wasn’t showing, which I found to be a relief. But I’ve given up on hiding it and am now wearing shirts I think are pretty clearly maternity shirts. These show that my boobs are quite large and there is a bulge in the stomach. People absolutely must be noticing, I think. But so far, no one has said anything.

I remind myself that my reproductive life is not really a topic of work conversation. So I’m not bringing it up. It now seems to me though to be a case of everyone is scared to get it wrong, so they all stay silent. I’m curious to see how long it will take before it becomes SO obvious that someone ventures to say something.

Jump from first to third trimester

I feel like there have been two stages to this pregnancy. Stage one – about 4.5 months, during which I barely felt pregnant besides some fatigue and pretty much went about life as usual. Then stage two, which began about two weeks ago, in which I’m suddenly showing, large, uncomfortable. I’m hungry, gaining weight, have less stamina and aches and pains have begun, along with a persistent thumping from within my belly. My clothes don’t fit and it’s time to make the move into maternity clothes. I can’t bend over like I used to and I’m starting to freak out at the thought of how to get this thing out of me.

I know it’s a process I have to just wait out and endure, but thinking of four more months like this is a pretty dreary prospect. I wish I was one of those women who love being pregnant – who feel beautiful and round and shiny and fulfilled, who wax poetic about what a joy it is to be pregnant.

I think it’s great to be a mom. I love it, despite the work and despite the stresses. It makes me a better person and I derive a lot of fulfillment from it. But I am not a fan of pregnancy. I’d gladly skip it if I could.