Tuesday, April 28, 2009

What a mother learns

I enjoyed this blog post by Lisa Belkin, recounting the lessons she has learned as a mother over the past 18 years.

I recently met a woman who had an extremely difficult time emotionally when the youngest of her three children went to school. Even in the process of telling me about it, tears appeared in her eyes.

“It’s so much harder when they are older,” she said. “When you are doing the right thing, they hate you for it.”

I’m sure that’s coming. I’ve expected it all along. But right now, things are perfect. I’m going to be grateful for the moment and thank River for teaching me to do that. I’m sure I’ll learn many other lessons over the 16 years to come, but for now, my lesson is to enjoy where I’m at and make the best of it.

I visited a friend this weekend with a sweet five month old baby. She asked whether holding the baby made me want another. It didn’t.

Perhaps it’s easier because we feel pretty secure we will have another at some point. We don’t have the angst of wondering, of waiting, of hoping. I’m sure the time will come when I long for a tiny baby again. But for now, I’m thrilled to have my body and my self back. I’m happy to have more time. I love the sweet hugs, kisses and smiles I get from River, as well as the joy I find in watching him explore the world. The tiniest things – from noticing his reflection in the bathtub switch to the joy of finding a carrot in his new plastic Little Tykes garden make him smile, and me too. Life is good.

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