Willow fell out of her swing last night. Yes, the moving swing placed on a hardwood floor. This time, when the wail pierced my earplugs, I knew right away I’d find her on the floor. Panic and guilt flooded my chest as I ran toward her, a pink swaddled screaming cocoon on the floor.
She calmed down immediately upon being offered the breast and doesn’t seem to be injured. But still, we feel horrible. I can’t imagine how frightening it must be to suddenly feel yourself falling, and hitting hard ground, when you can’t even move your limbs to block the fall. Mark came in and stroked her, then played with the swing to see if there was any other way we could use it.
Damn swing. Actually, it’s been a lifesaver so far, as it’s the easiest place to get her to sleep. But we bought it at a yard sale and the safety harness is missing a part, so it’s impossible to strap her in.
I tried keeping her in the bed with me last night, to shield her from another accident. I kept her there for 4.5 hours, until 5:30 a.m. I lost track of the number of times I was awakened during these hours as she nursed, fell asleep, wanted to nurse again, and again, and again. Some women seem to be able to nurse in their sleep. Not me. I wake up every time.
At 5:30 I was desperate. The swing has a toy bar that we haven’t used in the past. But it goes over the legs and has a space for each leg. So when the toy bar is on, it’s not possible to slide out the bottom as she had.
So I removed her legs from the swaddle, keeping her arms and chest swaddled, put her in the swing, and put the toy bar on, making sure the large knob went in between her legs. Now she could only get out by somehow pushing herself up to the top of the swing and over the side. We think propelling herself down while swaddled is pretty impressive, but up and over is probably beyond her abilities.
That worked, but it wasn’t long before she awoke for her next feeding. By 7:30 I was exhausted and asked Mark to switch with me. I put in earplugs and fell asleep in his bed for a luxurious two, uninterrupted, hours. Ahhh.
I recently left both of the kids at my gym’s childcare. The attendant held Willow and commented when I returned, “She’s mild-tempered, like River was when he was a baby. But she moves around a lot more.” Yes, that’s an understatement.