Pregnancy week 32

I struggle on a daily basis to stay conscious at work. This is no fun. I don’t want to be the pregnant lady passed out in the hallway.

Continued trouble sleeping means I’m taking a Tylenol pm on an almost nightly basis. I feel bad about this. My doctor reassures me that the benefits outweigh the risks. “You will only get heavier and your body will work harder and be more tired as the pregnancy progresses,” he said. “You need to get sleep while you can.” I know he’s right. Having been through it before, I feel my body needs every ounce of sleep and relaxation it can store. Yet I still wish it didn’t require medication.

My aversion to being on my back is so severe I couldn’t even stand lying on my back for 2-3 minutes while the doctor measured my uterus. I read somewhere this affects 8% of women.

I’m starting to wonder how long I want to keep working. A desire to stay busy and active, as well as bring in some income while I can, makes me want to keep going. A desire to rest more regularly and to spend more time cooking, cleaning and reading makes me want to stop. I was reassured to hear my doctor say that most of his patients stop at 36 or 37 weeks. My employer wants people to work to 38 weeks, but I’m no longer sure I’ll make it that long.

My mind is satisfied with rather menial things. I have to break complicated or analytical tasks down into small pieces and accomplish them over several days. I’m strangely content with a list of errands or organizational tasks.

I miss my husband. Due to my sleeping and back-lying issues, he is permanently relegated to the couch. I expected we’d be apart for several months after the birth, allowing at least one of us to get some sleep. I didn’t expect it to start several months beforehand.

I continue to count down, but feel some accomplishment at the 40 days that have passed since I started counting down. The upcoming holidays will hopefully provide distractions.

River is so calm and chipper and cheery about the prospect of the baby. It doesn’t seem to phase him at all. He is the complete zen-master of people entering and exiting his life. It is how I would like to be. He enjoys them while they are there, but doesn’t miss them when they are gone. No one’s absence or presence affects his ability to be happy with his own existence. I hope that quality stays with him.

belly week 32

It's growing.

Week 31/32 pregnancy

I'm continually in a state of confusion about what week I'm in. I thought it was 32. Maybe it's 31. Is one's due date supposed to be the end of week 40, or the beginning? Anyway, somewhere in the range of 31-32 weeks, here is where I'm at:

The rib kicks have begun. Ouch.

I almost fainted in a meeting with a supervisor today and she ran out
to get me water. Embarrassing.

I’m tired all day, but have a very hard time going to sleep, either for a nap or for the night. I’m taking a Tylenol p.m. on an almost nightly basis.

My nether regions feel like they are falling apart. I suppose it’s the pelvic bones loosening up in preparation for what is to come. But I wonder if it is instead remembered pain, warning me that perhaps I don’t want to go through that again.

On the positive side:

I’m still at only 26 pounds weight gain. I say only because for me, that's not a lot.

I got my bangs trimmed and the hair stylist didn’t notice I was pregnant until I got up to leave and she offered me my jacket. “Are you pregnant?” she asked, looking down at my stomach. When I said yes she replied, “Ohmigod, you are tiny.” It doesn’t feel that way but still, it’s better than being told I’m huge or asking if I’m expecting twins.

Still no stretch marks or linea nigra.

I’ve made it through one of the three holidays on my countdown. Just
Thanksgiving and Christmas to go (perhaps New Years as well?) and then
it will be over.

My weekly pre-natal massage is a lifesaver.