Wednesday, August 20, 2008

The 6 a.m. Morning Wake-Up

I’m writing this at 6:43 a.m. Believe it or not, I’m up at 6:43 a.m. every day, weekends included. But River is not. How did that happen?

For quite a while, River woke up at 6 a.m. on the dot. So I started to get used to it, though I didn’t like it. Then he began to sleep a little later, until 6:30 or so. I realized that if I got up at six, I could get a couple of ounces of milk by pumping, and maybe I could get something done – like prepare myself tea or breakfast.

Recently, River starting doing me the favor of sleeping until 7, 7:30, sometimes even 8. But I’m still up at 6 a.m. on the dot. I argue that it’s because I want to pump. That’s true, I do. I’m able to get a few ounces, which eventually goes into the freezer stockpile, and there is still plenty for River when he awakes.

But what really gets me up now is the Time to Myself. Even when I’m pumping, it’s quiet and peaceful. When I finish, from 6:20 until whenever River awakes is my time. I make myself a cup of tea. I surf the web. I write. I do the little things I’ve been meaning to do but can’t find time for. I plan my day. But I refuse to do household work. This is me time. And I love it.

My husband takes his me time in the evening. From 8 p.m. on, often into the wee hours of the morning, the shared office is his. Once I go to bed, I’m sure he basks in the quiet calm and in the knowledge that no one will bother him.

He gets more time than I do and his might be of a better quality – he knows that his quiet time is unlimited as long as he remains up. My quiet time can end at any moment – as soon as River needs me. But that’s OK. I get the benefit of the early morning sun – something I always wanted to enjoy. I feel like I’m ahead of everyone else by a little bit by being up and interacting with the world before most are even conscious. Most of all, I have glorious me time with no distractions. No one is going to stop by, call, or probably even email at this hour. My mind is free to focus on the things I want to think about. What a treat.

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