If I Had to Do it Over Again - Products

If I was going through pregnancy and childbirth again, these are things I would definitely buy, or do without.

During pregnancy:

• What to Expect When You’re Expecting
• Two fatherhood books
• The Snoogle body pillow
• Baby Bargains book
• Almond oil – I used this to avoid stretch marks on the recommendation of a Spanish friend. Don’t know if this is what prevented them, but I made it into the 10% or so of women who avoid stretch marks.
  
  Things I’d do without:
  · Breast pads and lanolin cream. Wait to see if you need them before buying.

Months 0+:

• Swaddle Mes (we used through 7 months)
• A good swing – we loved the Fisher Price Papasan
• Onesies
• What to Expect the First Year
• Sleepsacks
• My Breast Friend (I’d borrow one or buy it used)
• A baby carrier, but I’d purchase it AFTER the child is born to see which one is comfortable and which one the baby likes
• Lots of burp cloths
• For travel, a stroller frame (such as the Graco SnugRide) that accepts a pop-in carseat is the lightest way to go.
• Fenugreek, alfalfa or other milk-producing herb
• A breastpump
• A baby bathtub
• Household help
• Car-I-Oke music CD
• Easy Expressions hands free pumping bra (if breastfeeding and pumping)
  
  Things I’d do without:
  · A boppy
  · A crib or bassinet or playpen – if you think you need one, it’s still a good idea to wait until after the birth to see what the baby will accept. Many babies only want the closeness of another human for the first weeks or months.
  · Lots of fancy clothes – onesies and sleepsacks are the mainstay
  · A fancy stroller
  · Fancy nursery décor – the baby isn’t going to take any notice; it’s only worth it if it makes the parents happy.

Months 3+:

• An Ergo carrier – this is most useful at 6 months+, but it’s the best carrier I’ve come across and good for long-term use. It’s expensive though, so it would be a better deal to find one used.
• A jumper – if your baby isn’t eager to stand, this could wait, but if s/he is, they will love this. We liked the Fisher Price Rainforest Jumper.
• The swing remains very useful
• Some type of bed. If you want to make life easier, probably a crib that you’ll use for the long term would be best.
• BumGenius all-in-one cloth diapers – so easy even the dad accepts them.
  
  Things I’d do without:
  · An exersaucer – unless you can pick one up for free, as you often can on freecycle
  · Any type of travel crib or pen. Unless baby can roll over, a bed or carseat works just fine
  · Any but a few basic toys – the whole world is a toy.
  · Toys, accessories for car or stroller. We just didn’t find them necessary.
  · The chairs that help baby sit – those are useful for about two weeks, if you’re lucky.
  · Rice paper liners for cloth diapers – they irritated Soren’s behind and are only useful until the poops become more solid.
  · Any of the breastpump cleaning supplies – microwave sterilizing kit, wipes, etc. Never used them.
  · A fancy bedtime routine. Maybe some kids need it, but others don’t. No need for parents to stress themselves out with thinking that baby needs a bath every day before bed or other rituals if a bottle and a bedtime song are enough.

Months 6+

• A crib, if you don’t have one already
• Motherease cloth diapers (for home use – you can tell right away when baby is wet. This is useful if you don’t want baby to get used to sitting in wetness)
• Baby Bjorn little potty
• A professional portrait – surprisingly worth it. Sears did a great job
• Silicone ice cube trays and muffin pans for making baby food
• A decent food processor or blender
• An upright seat for the bathtub that keeps baby upright and contained, but allows to interact with water
• Pedometer and The Step Diet book – time to make sure mom is moving enough and beginning to shed that weight
  
  Things I’d do without:
  · Foam for the floor while learning to crawl – the usefulness is also very limited and baby will learn to crawl in any case
• Onesies - once the potty training begins, onesies are a pain to take off and get the baby on the pot. A few would be useful for special occasions. But for home, normal shirts work much better.
  · Shoes – we didn’t see any use for them before he could walk

If I Had to Do it Over Again

If I had it to do over again

If I had the opportunity to go through pregnancy and first childbirth again, knowing what I know now, these are the things I would do differently, and the things I would do the same.

Things I would do over:

• I would restrain my intake of sweets and other junk food during the third trimester and after the birth. Then again, maybe that indulgence was what got me through the experience emotionally. However, it also left me with some extra fat cells that are feeling at home in my body.
• Start pumping earlier – I didn’t start until six or seven weeks, when my supply was probably already established at just the level River needed. As a result, I never had excess and I didn’t get much pumping. I imagine it would have been hard to return to work and continue breastfeeding at 12 weeks. But I did enjoy the one-on-one time with baby, without having a machine attached to me as well. Maybe I’d start a bit earlier if I had it to again, but not a lot.
• Get a hospital grade pump right away – I didn’t research pumps and didn’t even realize there is a difference between hospital grades and those you can purchase in stores. I’d buy one used on ebay (as I ended up doing when River was 8 months old). Lactina Selects are now running about $350 used and seem to maintain their value pretty well.

Things I would definitely do again:

• Hire a Doula
• Have a good swing available from day 1
• Arrange for household help for the first two months – especially, someone to pass the baby off to in the mornings after sleepless nights
• Use cloth diapers
• Do prenatal yoga
• Treat myself to prenatal massages
• Get out of the house and continue on with life, taking baby along for the ride
• Have at least five months maternity leave
• Involve my husband in as many aspects of the experience as possible.