nosy neighbors

At times like this, I sometimes feel ill-prepared for the realities of
the adult world. We have a nosy neighbor. Someone warned me about her when we moved in, so I’ve tried my best to be nice. But they just inserted themselves in our business in a way that makes it very hard for me to be nice. It was more
of our tenant’s business she inserted herself into than ours, but the
result was that we lost our tenant (who I liked a lot) and the income,
just as I’m about to go on maternity leave and need the money.

I’m kind of at a loss of how to deal with it. I don’t think
confrontation will work, as she’s a long-term and well-connected
community resident, while we are newcomers. Getting on her bad side
won’t do us any good.

I probably need some time to practice acceptance. But in the
meantime, I can’t fake it, so I didn’t take River trick-or-treating
there, and they may well have felt the snub. I have this horrible
feeling of being watched and monitored. I’ve started making a point
of closing the shades and we’ve made plans to improve the shades on
the upper levels. Mark wanted to invest in better shades for our
bedroom and I was resistant, saying only those neighbors could
possibly see anything and they must have better things to do than
watch our house. Guess I was wrong.

I grew up with my parents, and thus my brother and I, not on speaking terms
with one of our next door neighbors. I don’t want to bring my son up
in a similar environment. Yet I’m kind of at a loss of how to deal
with it. This is an entirely new realm for me and kind of makes me
want to go rent an apartment in a large city.

Does anyone have advice on how to deal with, or survive, nosy neighbors?