I told Mark last night. Or rather, he guessed. Earlier in the evening, he asked if I was happy and I said yes. He asked why and I said I’d tell him a bit later. He read it from me there.
I knew he wasn’t thrilled about more children, but he handled it calmly and we spent some tender moments together that evening.
But he found himself up between 2 and 5 a.m., unable to sleep due to stress. “My conscious took the news OK. But I guess my subconscious didn’t,” he said.
I feel bad that he feels stressed out. But I think he had similar feelings about River. And now he loves River and is glad to have him in his life. And, finally, River is starting to show some positive attention to dad. So I hope it’s just a general resistance to change and that it will all work out for the best.
As for me, I’m doing fairly well. It’s pretty thrilling to have an appetite and energy. I’m setting myself ambitious exercise goals to fulfill while I still can. Yet, the beginnings of nausea appear to be coming on. It is still minor and still doesn’t affect my rather significant appetite. But I kind of feel I’m on a boat at sea, with a little rock here and there that doesn’t let me forget I’m floating.
One symptom I definitely have is fatigue. Oh, for the opportunity to take an afternoon nap at home. Where are you Latin American schedule with a two-hour lunch break? By 3 p.m. I am seriously ready for a nap.